Tales of a multhi-etnic kid #2

See this thing called racism..

On July 12th - right after the #BLM-demonstration in Dordrecht, I wrote this piece. The conversations with my parents are teaching me how important it is to keep asking questions and - as a millennial and a third-gen kid /Rotterdammert - limited my perception is. It took a while before I learned what questions to ask and honestly, I still am learning. Before I "just accepted things were the way they are" But the conversations with my father - who came to the Netherlands to study and put everything on everything for it (just like my mum) - show me a reality that is unfamiliar to me.

My dad's pragmatic thinking often shows causes us to clash - but I've noticed because I learned to ask more questions
(rather HOW to ask questions), the more I start understanding him. And the Netherlands my parents knew... But also Suriname.

In one of the first conversations I had with my father about racism, he clicked his tongue and said "I don't experience racism". It took me a while to realize because he focussed on BEING -  his studies and career - he simply did not acknowledge racism. This “I just don't do it.. ” was a divergent focus.

By making that statement you basically aren't putting anyone above you and you can just be.  Sometimes I wonder whether this is the best solution. Just saying: Screw it! I'm just going build myself up, build the people around me. Screw all these (D&I) conversations. Anything having to do with anything - just being your ultimate self. But the reality is when you are conscious of intercultural behavior, microaggressions, and systemic behaviors - you can’t really go back to unseeing the patterns.

Today (July 13th) I was helping out at the Black Lives Matter protest in Dordrecht (a smaller village next to Rotterdam).
Here I am standing, just minding my business, and this "All Lives Matters" -hooligan randomly starts a staredown with me. I know they are ALM because earlier they passed me and I overheard them talking. Back to the staredown - 2 minutes in, he taps his friend on the shoulder to stare at me.. together... If my face was a meme you’d see all question marks around it, but I kept staring back. For a moment it fell as if my 🤨 gaze got baptized to Cyclops (XMEN), shortly after this encounter they left..
I was so confused, but one of my fellow safety guards told me this was their attempt to intimidate me/us

Sometimes I wonder when either racism - being BIPOC - really is my problem... 

• If we are still having "debates" about racism, where white people to this day are still getting most of the screentime while (BI)POC literally are put in the background/ignored or interrupted

• If peaceful protesters & anti-racism activists are being framed as terrorists, while in actuality all they do is stand still - whilst racist scum is throwing fireworks, vandalize public property, microaggression, intimidate,
  etc. etc. are still free of "labels"

• If white organizations/institutes are "still working on multi-annual plans to implement inclusions"
  or "aren't able to find (BI)POC

• If there are still white organizations that include BIPOC grassroots/programmers/creators in their plans for the funding, but as soon as the funding is in they cut these same BIPOC's "due to budget cuts"

• If the Dutch government still has to "debate" whether neither they should "apologize" for their role in colonization & slavery. An apology is acknowledging you did something that's not ok. This "so-called golden era" was disgusting and we all know it! 

  Let's not forget how we live in a world where as BIPOC* speaking up about racism - you get framed as being "too aggressive", "too emotional" and other micro-aggressions.

  
  Radical activism is you loving your entire being.

  
  Allowing yourself to grow into a better human and celebrate the elephant skin we've gained because it has been programmed in our DNA by intergenerational surviving. Being your unapologetic self is daring to decolonize and breakaway from the "illusions" forced upon us - as life is more than merely surviving,
  Sometimes it is learning how to speak the language of our dreams
  
  Radical activism is saying: I am the norm - not other, as my passport is as valuable as it is of white (Dutch)man.

  Radical activism works on all layers - it is not just protesting.

  It is the mother who raises her kids with the historic past, or just with love. It's being the only BIPOC in a white space - just because you wanted to study and followed your ambition. It is choosing not to go with the flow because you decided to follow your own path making a positive contribution to the community.

  It's being there for your community

  Finding each other and building. Talking about the pains but also celebrate together. Support each other and root for each other. We don't have t be the same or fight for the same jobs. There is enough for everyone ..

• And frankly, there is still plenty of work to do ....

  Simply radically loving ourselves and allowing ourselves to be ourselves. Being human.

  People who sometimes still have to learn a lot and can learn from each other.